...and I hate my body. That's why I'm putting it through this torture. And hopefully by doing so we will start hating each other less and less. Today was awful. It was, officially, my first day of training for a half marathon. Technically, it was supposed to start yesterday with running, but my roommate didn't feel good so we vowed to make it up on Friday. So today was cross training day and we rode our bikes for 30-40 minutes. Well, she probably did. I rode, took a break, rode, took a break, walked up some hills, rolled down some hills, and died twice. I don't think I ever want to ride my bike again. Actually, that's not true. Just maybe not on such steep hills. And it's not like these hills are particularly steep, I'm just so out of shape and have never really ridden a bike on hills at all. I'm from flat country. Plus my gears kind of suck.
Tomorrow is running, and I have a feeling I'm going to die a few more times. But hopefully as the weeks pass I'll get better and better, and my body won't hate me so much. And maybe on the next cross training day I'll swim laps instead.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
I forgot. You ever forget? Happened to me.
I was going to blog about something the other day because I remember thinking, "Hm, that's a good thing to blog about, I should totally blog about that. Yeah, I think I will blog about that." But now, for the life of me, I can not remember what it was. Maybe I'll remember somewhere in the middle and totally interrupt my stream of consciousness.
I wonder if it's the thing I journaled about the other day and just decided to journal instead of blog so no one would read it...Il est possible...
Anyway, so I'm apparently about to start training for a half marathon with my roommate. And the more I think about it, and the closer it gets to next week (which is when I plan to start, keyword: plan) I keep thinking to myself, "What am I THINKing? What am I getting myself into? There's no way I could ever run a half marathon...This is ME we're talking about! I'm fat and lazy and just sit on the couch all day. I hate, above all exercise (except lunges of course), running. I'm so out of shape, and I feel for my roomie who is probably going to struggle just to get me into running shoes. Not to mention I hate getting up early...AND I'll probably end up giving up halfway through, if I even make it that far..." And so on and so forth. All these negative thoughts keep coming into my head. It's almost like all those other times when I plan to start exercising or working out, but I never get serious about it. But this time is serious because I have someone keeping me accountable, and it's making me anxious. It's taking me off guard. It's like, wait, I really have to do this? I'm really going to do this? Really? Really?
But I know those thoughts are just coming from the devil. He's putting those thoughts into my head to scare me. To make me back down. Because if I back down, even with an accountability partner, then I will probably never get on an exercise plan, I'll never lose weight, and I'll never find a man!! Okay, that was a joke, but for real, I know I need to get healthy and this is my chance. I have someone who I KNOW will make me stick to it because she already knows what race she's running. And at first I thought I would just train with her and not actually run a race, but apparently she has bigger plans for me than I do. Which isn't saying much...
So I'm training for a half marathon. Thirteen-point-one miles. I have ~six months. All that's left to do now is pick a training plan. And get some new shoes.
I wonder if it's the thing I journaled about the other day and just decided to journal instead of blog so no one would read it...Il est possible...
Anyway, so I'm apparently about to start training for a half marathon with my roommate. And the more I think about it, and the closer it gets to next week (which is when I plan to start, keyword: plan) I keep thinking to myself, "What am I THINKing? What am I getting myself into? There's no way I could ever run a half marathon...This is ME we're talking about! I'm fat and lazy and just sit on the couch all day. I hate, above all exercise (except lunges of course), running. I'm so out of shape, and I feel for my roomie who is probably going to struggle just to get me into running shoes. Not to mention I hate getting up early...AND I'll probably end up giving up halfway through, if I even make it that far..." And so on and so forth. All these negative thoughts keep coming into my head. It's almost like all those other times when I plan to start exercising or working out, but I never get serious about it. But this time is serious because I have someone keeping me accountable, and it's making me anxious. It's taking me off guard. It's like, wait, I really have to do this? I'm really going to do this? Really? Really?
But I know those thoughts are just coming from the devil. He's putting those thoughts into my head to scare me. To make me back down. Because if I back down, even with an accountability partner, then I will probably never get on an exercise plan, I'll never lose weight, and I'll never find a man!! Okay, that was a joke, but for real, I know I need to get healthy and this is my chance. I have someone who I KNOW will make me stick to it because she already knows what race she's running. And at first I thought I would just train with her and not actually run a race, but apparently she has bigger plans for me than I do. Which isn't saying much...
So I'm training for a half marathon. Thirteen-point-one miles. I have ~six months. All that's left to do now is pick a training plan. And get some new shoes.
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